CATastrophes and DOGgone-its!

Wow! So today started off easy enough. Some light housework, lunch, a workout, hanging with Kevin and figuring out some financial things that surprised us (we will be able to buy a larger home a year before we thought)...just normal stuff. So when Kevin left for work this afternoon I decided to make a batch of my homemade cupcakes and homemade icing. They turned out yummy. After the clean up it was time to walk my dogs. Just up the street as we began our walk I saw a little Boston Terrier sitting in the driveway of a neighbors house. I figured maybe he was just sitting outside waiting on someone to let him in the house so I walked on. I take two dogs at a time (as most of you know) when I walk, I was probably about 150 yards from the halfway point, when I heard the unmistakable sound of hissing, clawing, growling...ya know..CAT FIGHT! Two cats had a knock down drag out about 15 feet from me and my two biggest dogs. Now (SEGUE ALERT), I'd like to first point out the importance of a quality dog food. One with out fillers, corn, ya know...crap. I personally feed Solid Gold Hund-n-Flocken (it's German- stop snickering), My dogs are 12, 10, 9, and 7...average lifespan for my 12 yr old dog's breed (Catahoula) is 13 yrs. and the vet says he looks like an average 5 year old. -end of segue- So since you know that my dogs are in great health for their ages..you can imagine that little 'ol me had a hard time holding on to two fully grown dogs (at 75lbs and 65lbs respectively) were *so* much fun to hand on to. So there I am -death grip on leashes when one of the cats from the fight (the loser I'm guessing) pops out of the bushes next to us. I freak out, the dogs freak out, the cat freaks out...and then...IT HAPPENED!

The cat runs out in front of me and the dogs, crosses our path and the dogs jerk forward while I'm holding them back for dear life. This cat did this insanely graceful hip-hop-skip-slide across the gravel then onto the curb and dashed across the street (to my horror) into on coming traffic. The cat runs across one lane, then to the second and gets just center enough that when this truck passes the cat is right between the tires and the truck drives forward missing the cat, the cat spins, flips and then rolls (seriously- he ROLLED on his back like freaking Ethan Hunt from mission impossible) and out from under the truck and safely to the other side of the road before the second car crushes him.

It was at that point that I realized I was holding my breath. Kitty-Catastrophe averted, I continued on my way and eventually turned down the street that led me to the turn back home. This street I dread. Every freaking day some little punk-ass kid (I think I've mentioned him before) bothers me when I walk my dogs. I makes ugly gestures at me. He mouths off, and makes obnoxious noises to get the dogs riled up. I finally...after MONTHS had enough. I turned around and yelled at the little jerk to get his mother. She came out and so did a neighbor next door. The neighbor seemed to agree with me about how he behaves. He got an ass whoppin, and I felt amazingly better! I always had horrid anxiety about passing that house. I tried to ignore him for as long as I could, but he got what he deserved. Okay so I went on and I was on the last block before mine when I saw the same little dog from before, the cute little Boston Terrier. He was definitely lost. So I took the big dogs home, went back and got the Boston Terrier, put him in my garage and took his pic then made flyers. I walked the little dogs then and posted the flyers then went home. Tomorrow we'll take the Boston Terrier (that we've 'named' Fogerty) to the vet to check for any Microchips. I hope that

whoever this little guy belongs to calls me soon. He's a sweet little guy. He seems to like little kids (his tail wags when he sees them) but he's a bit skittish around them. I can't have him in the house though because of my own dogs. I don't have an extra room or a crate to put him in. This is another reason why we are trying to move as soon as possible to a bigger home. I'd love to rescue dogs with my sister. She's rescuing when she can, but we could get so much more done if I had more room. We'd love a larger home with two separate fenced areas. One for the kids and our own dogs, and one fenced in area outside and room in the house for fosters or rescues. Well anyways...so my day started normal and ended BUSY! I'm still doing stuff and it's after 10pm already. Now off to get the kiddos tucked in and Fogerty settled for the night in the garage. ugh! Kevin would have to work on a day this crazy. :P

OH! and by-the-way: while I'm thinking about it; I am going to try and end each blog post with a funny pic of my dogs or my kids.

Jaesus. 



Here we have Miss Peggy Sue playing dress up with Laney Jo

                                                                         

LAUGHABLE article on "dos and dont's" for military spouses.

I know that sure, there are some things that as a military spouse we must watch closely. Some behaviors and such...but some of these do's and don'ts I will be listing made me LMFAO!


Do’s and don’ts while in uniform

by Whitney Bailey

The military service etiquette we abide by today is steeped in several hundred years of U.S. history. Many rules change over time as the military updates codes of conduct to reflect new attitudes and etiquette. However, some traditions still exist that may seem a bit antiquated (or even unfair) to you, the spouse.

When reviewing the list below, keep in mind that maintenance of these rules allows service members to project professionalism. These rules apply to your service member anytime he is in uniform, but many also apply to you when you are you attending a military function or in public with your uniformed hubby.


Okay thanks for that lovely intro Whitney....but honestly some of these rules are hardly ever enforced, and some are down right STUPID. but let's do explore the rigid rules shall we?? ((of course I'll be giving you a play-by-play of the more stupid ones that no one really pays attention to)).


Do:


Walk on your husband’s left side so he can salute others.
-Actually this isn't a half bad bit of advice. It sure beats getting SMACKED in the freaking head on accident by a flying elbow because hubs is saluting! LOL


Refer to your spouse by his first name or nickname, or as “my husband.” Do not refer to your husband as “Capt. Smith” or “the Captain.”
-Okay so here is why this is a stupid piece of advice. If I go to my husband's squadron and ask: "Hi, is Kevin around?" Do you honestly think in an institution that uses rank and last names to identify it's members, that me calling my husband by his first name...or his nickname (Shaggy) will actually clue these people in on WHO THE FUCK I'm looking for? Yeah I don't think so. It saves me tons of time to just ask: "Hey can you tell me where TSgt [our last name] is?"


Stand at a public function or ceremony when the senior officer enters and is announced. This applies to everyone in attendance.
-Sure my husband maybe, but my ass shall remain in a chair. I didn't sign my name to anything requiring me to bow to your rank. :) and I mean that nicely. (besides I've never met a spouse in 10 yrs of this life that does that).

Offer your husband an umbrella in the rain, but only if it’s black. He’s not allowed to carry any other color.
-Actually this is true, but honestly....the only umbrella we have is purple and I can tell you right now....they don't give two SHITS what color it is so long as you show up DRY. A wet uniform is worse than the color of your damn umbrella.

Push the baby carriage or stroller so your spouse doesn’t have to. It’s considered “unmilitary” to do so while in uniform.
-This one is just utterly STUPID. Why is pushing a stroller unmilitary? oh...military members aren't suppose to have families or be normal? Oh does this only apply to men? I have a feeling when it was created that's the thinking behind it. For the record, when a FEMALE military service member takes her child to the doctor or to school or daycare she may have need of a stroller...I've seen men and women in uniform pushing strollers for years. So to this rule say- blow me, and btw- it's NONmilitary not 'unmilitary'.

Help your spouse carry any packages or bundles to make it easier for him to salute. (Are you wondering if a man made up these rules so that wives would have to do all the heavy lifting?)
-I don't wonder if a man made up all these rules, I know damn well they did. AND any idiot that decides to carry heavy crap around in an area that requires lots of salutes ought to be smart enough to bring a bag w/handles, or a cart!


Don’t:


Show public displays of affection, except at homecomings and goodbyes. This includes kissing and holding hands.
- lol, yeah PDAs are forbidden. But honestly, we hold hands, and he's given me a peck on the cheek. *breakin' tha law, breakin' tha law!*

Offer your spouse a piece of gum. It is not “military” for him to chew it. The same goes for smoking while in uniform.
-This one is just downright HILARIOUS! Next time we're on base I'll take a pic of EVERY Airman, Sgt, Capt. and Col. I see smoking IN UNIFORM! Dude it would take up 4 pages to do so. They most certainly do, and CAN smoke. They have designated areas for that. And...after a smoke one might WANT to offer their spouse a stick of minty gum!


Allow him to put his hands in his pockets unless he is placing or retrieving an item.
-This one is true too. It's a stupid rule that borders on *fucking stupid*. I swear some of the shit they make up is just to get a laugh. By the way- I love how they phrase some of these as Don't: Allow him. Allow him? What am I? His mother? He's a big boy.

Refer to your husband’s orders as “our orders” unless you are a service member yourself.
-Oh BLOW ME! If my husband and I are a couple- joined as "one flesh"...and OBVIOUSLY where he goes so too do I, then whatever orders HE gets are MINE TOO, so suck it! If my name and the names of our children are on the oders because we are accompanying him then they are OUR ORDERS! Any orders WE GET- are OUR ORDERS. *eye roll*

Offer him food or drink while he’s walking. He should not be eating, drinking or using a cell phone while walking in uniform.
- Yeah that's true, but mostly because half the Airmen I meet are too fucking stupid to do two things at once.


Refer to others in the service as “sir” or “ma’am,” even if your spouse does. Refer to them by their rank and last name (“Capt. Smith”).

-Oh I see...so I cannot use respectful label? Yeah....I'm southern. If someone who is my 'elder' is speaking to me and they ask me a question I answer w/Yes, Sir or Yes, Ma'am. (or No, Sir/No Ma'am). Give me a break. OH and btw- so I have to call everyone ELSE by their last name and rank, but not my own husband....even when everyone else uses the name and rank my husband has *therefore* making it easier for them to understand WHO I'm talking about.

 Allow your child to wear your spouse’s uniform for Halloween. Uniforms bearing insignia, badges and tabs should be worn only by authorized personnel.
-Well DUH!!! You'd have to be a complete MORON to do that. BUT you can allow them to wear them if you take off any insignia or badges. Hell Kyle has some old BDU pants of Kevin's that he wears when he goes hunting.


These were the rules from this one article. Some dumb, some practical but a bit "caveman-ish". LOL But now you get the idea of some of the crap I have to be aware of. And for the record...it's not as rigid as this makes it appear.

Jaesus.

Please spare me people...unisex my ASS

We've all seen those people on Yahoo!Answers or where ever else claiming a certain name as "unisex now" and therefore okay for usage on a girl. Yes JUST a girl. Let's face it, the ONLY reason that anyone ever uses the "it's unisex" justification is when they want to use a traditionally masculine name on a girl. You never see someone vehemently defending their choice to use a traditional girls name on a boy. I've seen thousands of questions defending their choice to use Elliott or James or Kyle on a girl, but NEVER would you see anyone defending themselves in such a passionate manner to use Ella or Janis or Kayla on a boy.

Try as the 'boys names on girls club' might, the simple fact that their argument doesn't flow both ways is their ultimate down fall in trying to validate their point. Honestly can you see someone arguing that the name Sally is "unisex" and therefore appropriate on a boy? So why is it such a huge stretch to imagine that some people feel the same ridiculousness about Sally on a boy, that they do with James on a girl? Masculinizing girls names to me is some misguided attempt to make girls of this generation seem 'stronger'. We live in a world where a woman must be more than 'just' a woman. We are pressured in our daily life to be not just a sensitive caregiver, mother, friend, and nurturer. We are also expected to be smart, successful and carry on the equal rights banner that our grandmothers and mothers fought for us. We are suppose to be super women. An impossible task. So now people have equated "masculine girl name" as = strong successful woman. People are devaluing the validity of a nice strong feminine name. In today's society people mistakenly think that a strong masculine name equals success or popularity or fame, etc. A woman named "Jaymes" (James) in the work place might seem more successful, serious, or important to the parents of said child, but in the long run...most people would take a Josephine more serious than a woman named Jaymes.

I'm not saying that I don't think people should use "unisex names" at all. I personally don't care for them, but I'm not hostile about it either. What I am saying is that if you are going to use, or like, or consider, or love "unisex" names...don't tell me they are unisex if you don't consider them a possibility for girls AND boys. It's not 'unisex' if the name is not usable for both genders- period...no matter you're preference of which you plain to use it on. Don't argue for a certain masculine name on a girl if you don't consider it a boys name too and yet you still call it unisex. It's hypocritical. Jus'sayin'. : )

Jaesus.

**A special thanks to Jane (Infamous Bunny) for inspiring this little blog post of mine!**

5 days since my last blog...no way!! What?!

Holy crap! Yeah I spaced. I completely thought..."Yeah I did a blog the other day, I'm golden"...*eeeerrrrgh* WRONG! :S Sorry my lovelies. So what's been going on with me? Battle of the birthdays, that's what! Laney's was on the 8th as most of you saw....well my sister-in-law's bday is tomorrow. Then my dad's, Kyle's, and my monster-in-law's birthday is all next week. Then I have my brother's bday, Brandon's bday, and both my nephew's bdays in March.

Someone please make the bdays STOP before my head explodes! Seriously. I think I might die from birthday overload! Ha, so anyways, I've been really busy with all this bday crap going on and oops...forgot about my blog. I sowwy!! :) Forgive me?

Jaesus.

Love that family of mine.

I got a newsletter today. My family's newsletter. Yes, we are "that" kind of family. Always keeping up with each other. Our family reunion is every June. We always get a news letter in February or March highlighting all the things that have happened over the last year. New cousins born, deaths of loved ones, happy stories, fun moves, or hard times. It's always in there. Today I got in the mail our newsletter

written by my dear second cousin Tinker. She said something in this news letter that really touched me a lot. Something that I thought only I noticed, but it's pretty apparent to me now that I have an exceptional family indeed. I love them to pieces and feel so blessed to have them in my life. Tinker writes: "...I witness the abundance of love this family has always had for each other. This is proven every year, and I hope that you have witnessed this at the reunions. Every time you see one of our family members see another member, perhaps for the first time since the last reunion, you will see the same things happen. Always present in the eyes of each one, there is so much emotion of happiness and excitement. The smiles are spread all over their faces and it equals nothing short of pure joy." I fee so lucky that my children will grow up with such a close extended family. I look forward to the many reunions to come and the time I get to spend with my loved ones. This year there are only 3 remaining siblings of the original family of 13 children born to my Great-grandparents Pa Jack and Grandma Josephine). My Great Aunts Ann and Mary Alice, and my Pap Pa are all that are left. We might be Scottish, but we party and love like any huge Italian family! :D

Jaesus.

The Poker Game.

So every now and then me, Shaggy and our good friend Mcclenny get together to shoot the shit, drink some beer and play some poker. :) It's always fun. I'm usually at the

the top of my game, but alas this night I was not. Shags wiped the floor with me and Mcclenny was absolutely no help whatsoever! I had the best hand of the night...so I thought. I bet high and kept my cool. Watching as Shags eyes shifted back to his cards then to his chips. I was thinking..."I GOT THIS!", but it turned out that Shags was being a little sneaky ninja and he pulled out the big guns!

He clobbered me, took most of my chips, including my "lucky ante" (the one with the cute little hole in the middle). I was sad. :*( And after that came my downfall! I couldn't win a hand at all. I caught no break. I would get ahead and then *WHAM* Shags would knock me down again, or Mcclenny would run a sneak attack and capture a huge pot of chips. It was so bad I had to start using runts candies as substitute chips! *hangs head in shame*- I will never live this one down. I'm usually the card shark, but not this night! WOE IS ME! I got my ass beat by a bunch of amateurs! Oh the humiliations of it all! Oh the shame!

After Shags cleaned me out I watched as he and Mcclenny battled it out. Back and forth the stacks would go and I thought for sure we'd have a rematch, but in the end Mcclenny finally managed to break Shags' winning streak and he cleaned him out! Total time to victory: 3 hours! And so we toasted to the next round! May we meet again soon and may I gut you boys to death the next time! ARGH! :)

Jaesus.                                                                           

Happy Birthday Dear Laney...

Today Laney turned 5. I cannot BELIEVE how fast time went by! Five!!!! OMG! *sigh* my little girl is getting so big. We had a busy day today. We got all dressed and ready to go and took off to Kyle's school to check him out early for the day to celebrate Laney's birthday. We went to McAlister's

for lunch. Laney had mac-n-cheese w/Cheetos...(cheese overload?!), Hayden had a peanut butter sandwich with Cheetos, Kyle had a grilled chicken salad and so did I and Kevin had the classic pot roast. It was YUMS and the kids had a blast. We goofed around and took pics while we chatted about going to the park and the birthday part that was to come later that day. Laney was so excited she was nearly pinging off the walls of the place. :) Laney and I ended up having a huge giggle fit over some silly noise that

Hayden made. It was a fun afternoon. We went to the park after that and played for a couple of hours before we went home. Laney and Hayden watched a movie while I decorated and got everything ready for her party. It was awesome. She was a true little princess for her party too. :) I will leave you now with some pics from the day.  

Jaesus.                                                                        

Football Shmootball

Superbowl? What Superbowl? Football is forbidden in our house. It's a waste of time, boring, pointless, overrated, and glorified in a way that makes me sick to my stomach.



Total Cuteness.



So what do we do instead of act like sheep and flock with the brain dead crowds of sports fans to the nearest sports bar or block party? We...CHILL!

Jaesus.

I love goofy kids

I do...I really love goofy kids. Kids say and do some of the funniest crap. Mine are champs at being goofy. I do have some photographic proof of this. Oh yes, mama has blackmail photos ready and waiting to show off too! Evil huh? I think Hayden and Brandon are the goofiest of the



Hayden doing the spoon trick.

bunch. I have no idea where they get that silliness from...no really, NO idea at all [sarcasm]. I think goofy kids are the ones with the biggest imaginations. They are the ones that go on to create fantastic stuff. I mean...can you imagine how goofy and imaginative George Lucas was as a kid? Course they could think up other things than hugely famous iconic movies. There are lots of fun creative stuff out there that goofy people probably thought up: the slinky, silly putty, Nerf footballs, silly string....PEZ. Seriously. :) 

Brandon riding the kiddie merry-go-round.

At any rate, I think it will be pretty awesome to see what kind of things my goofy kids think up as they get older. I honestly can imagine quite a few things that Hayden and Brandon might grow up to be...yes all goofy things mind you. Hayden I can see being a stunt double or dare devil, a rodeo clown, a big wave surfer, a snake charmer, or perhaps a wrestler for the WWF. Brandon I can see being a mad scientist, an evil genius (or is that the same as the first?), an architect that builds things solely out of legos, an adventure novelist, and a space and/or time traveler. Course there is plenty of time for them to figure out the best career move...but ya know, a mom can dream right? Especially if that mom is just as goofy as her kiddos.

Jaesus.

Abstinence Only?! Give me a break!

Today Kyle handed me a permission form for an abstinence only class at school. Seriously? Abstinence only people? Do I even need to say it? I will anyways- Abstinence only programs DO NOT WORK! Don't believe me? Memphis-90 pregnant teens-one school! 'Nuff said. Sure waiting is something I will encourage, but let me make myself clear here....waiting until marriage? Not so much. Why? Because it's unrealistic for someone to do so. This is someone you will be married to for the rest of your life, right? Well I don't know about you but I'm not buying the car with out taking it for a test

drive. I don't expect any less from my kids. There is no way I'd want them to hold out and then be completely disappointed if they are not a sexually compatible couple after the vows are said. Sex is a very important part of a marriage, of a relationship. If the sex isn't good, the relationship suffers. I don't mean my children should be screwing everything they see and then picking the one they have the hottest sex with to marry. I'm saying that I understand how important sex is to a couple and that finding the right person that you can not only laugh with, that you can count on, that you can trust and care for...but having great sex with is part of the ideal package. I also do not want my kids not having any idea about the WHYS you should wait till you're emotionally ready. Notice I said EMOTIONALLY, not 'till you're married'. I want them to know how to protect themselves, I want them to know about all forms of protection, diseases, babies and what's involved with pregnancy and parenting. I want them to have ALL the knowledge they can. I just don't agree with the religiously charged "wait till marriage- abstinence only" bullshit! And if that makes me unpopular I really don't get a fuck. At least I know my kids will be smarter than the average clueless virgin!                                                          

 Jaesus                                                                                

Insomniac Nightmare

Snow, rain, ice...yeah they all suck and honestly lend a great hand in setting the scene of what my mood is lately- gloomy! I've had insomnia for the last week. This is starting to get ridiculous. My schedule is completely flip-flopping and on top of it all it's making me overly hungry for no apparent reason. Of course I haven't been indulging, but it's been really hard to resist a good 'ol fashion "midnight snack".

I would much rather be the type that could go to bed early. I've always been a night owl. I'm sure my mother had a hard time dealing with my restlessness as a child. My dad was an insomniac as well. I sometimes wonder if insomnia can be genetic. I'm not really sure...I've never looked it up. lol, I remember one time my ex best friend got me this book that was for insomniacs. It was full of the most BORING topics, a sure fire way to help someone doze off to sleep. Sounded like a great idea. I found it hilariously frustrating when, one night in a full on insomniac lock down, I couldn't go to sleep and I sat in bed to read that book. I actually got through five chapters before I realized that: A) This book isn't all that boring. B) I wasn't the least bit bored or sleepy and C) Thanks to my new book I now knew how cows process proteins. It was a good effort on her part I'll give her that. So, I guess if my blogs aren't a 'daily' event it's more than likely due to insomnia, OR if I end up with five blogs in one day...sometimes I feel like a slug and sometimes like a rabid kangaroo. At any rate, I will now try some melatonin supplements and see if I can get any Zs before 3am.

Jaesus.                                                                         

Another stroll...at sunset.

Just though I'd share with you the lovely sunset and fun things that Shags and I saw on our walk today with the dogs. It is so pretty here at sunset. I love West Texas sunsets.

Jaesus.